Monday, July 06, 2009

Hey You (Sonshine) Get Out Of My Face!

After the bike shopping on Saturday morning Bert and I took a dander up the street. Could we get moving through that town? For we were everywhere impeded and besieged by mobs of green-shirted God-botherers from a local cult church. They were on every street but the bulk of them were congregated around a group of musicians and singers at the bandstand, roaring, singing, lepping up and down like buck eedjits and grinning like loons. I think beaming and grinning must be compulsory in their church. Or maybe they were just really happy because they had found the Lord and he was not a stuffy old Lord like the Presbyterians and the Methodists and the other churches have. Their Lord must be a zany, fun-loving, tone-deaf Lord for, to be honest, the band was pure shite and no amount of maniacal pogo-ing Christians will make me believe otherwise. I was surly when I refused their literature. Bert didn’t see the point of that for, as he pointed out, if you’re clutching one of their handouts they’ll not try to give you another.


I’m considering putting a complaint in to the Council about the hideous din of it. It certainly did not make me want to hang around town and spend money. And I’m sure I wasn’t the only one who felt alienated by the spectacle. Of course there were people who seemed to think it was all very jolly but if we must have Christians monopolizing the bandstand every Saturday morning I’d prefer the dour gang preaching hellfire and damnation. And I’d definitely rather receive tracts from downcast, humble souls who, even if they might think I’m a sinner bound for hell, at least will have the decency not to gloat!

6 comments:

Ronni said...

You didn't ask for an "amen," but I'll give you one, anyway--and a resounding one, too!

Tuesday Kid said...

Car stereo, windows down, sweaty metal at top volume. Problem solved.

Grannymar said...

Mine will be a silent (thinking of your ears) Amen!

@Tuesday Kid,sorry but stereo blaring heavy metal at top volume, while the car roars like the exhaust is cracked is double the same pollution offence to me.

Nelly said...

And besides my car stereo wouldn't be up to it...it's a sedate little machine wafting the delicate strains of Rufus Wainwright, Handel and gentle Irish folk music into the air...

Mudflapgypsy said...

Self righteous wan*ers. Can you see any other group that aren't followers of jesus being allowed to use the free electricity supply and spout whatever they want at the bandstand? No.
No one should be allowed to do it at all then.
Personally, I would bring a deck chair and a picnic to watch the followers of the church of satan set up and preach their message at the bandstand but only for the ensuing entertainment.
I think it could be fun.

Nelly said...

Deckchair & picnic? In Ballymena the ensuing fun might be dangerous. Someone would send for the police (the ones with helmets, body armour and big sticks) and you'd end up in hossie.