Bert comes into the kitchen and tells me,
Swisser’s been showing me pictures of her vole.
Her hole?
No her vole.
Vole. What’s she on about?
Says there’s a vole in her back yard,
Her hole!
Says it’s been there for a week.
It’s probably a rat.
Says it sits on the windowsill and looks in at her. Says it twitches its whiskers. Says it’s a cute wee thing.
It doesn’t sit on her windowsill and look in at her!
Come and see the wee film she took.
I go into the other room and Swisser reaches me her phone. I watch a little film of a large brown rodent sniffling and zigzagging about in her herbaceous border, its big scaly tail snaking behind it. Sadly she has no footage of the charming creature sitting sweetly on her sill looking in at her.
Well! What do you think? It’s a vole, isn’t it?
It’s a rat.
9 comments:
Hmmm...A rat by any other name is still a rat. No?
I should say so!
If she wants to move up to gophers, I can send her dozens from my California yard!
anne
Gophers! I dare not mention them to her or they'll be the next big thing.
What about a skunk? Exotic and potentially lethal(ish).
PS: Bet it's a rat.
Dead skunk in the middle of the road. (Loudon Wainwright III)
Can never think of skunks without remembering that song. And Pepe Le Peu of course.
It is definitely a rat. But Swisser has a history of mis-identifying wildlife. She claimed to have seen a beaver in the River Bush. There is a filthy joke in there somewhere but I don't know how to extract it.
This made me laugh out loud. Ahhhh, some things never change. Swisser and her 'notions'.
ROFLMAO, You kill me, Nelly. :-)
LOL Thats a border rat for sure. I should send her a few of the coyotes from N California, they would keep her guessing.
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