Slams, clatters and rattles are coming from the kitchen. I go in to find Bert is out with the kitchen scales, the self-raising flour and his go-to baking book, Mary Berry's Favourite Recipes, published in 1988.
I ask,
What are you making?
Rock cakes.
Ugh!
What's wrong with rock cakes?
Stodgy and boring.
Don't have any then.
Since Bert stopped smoking he cannot stop eating and if there is nothing 'nice' in the house he will make something.
He goes to the fridge and doesn't find what he's looking for.
There's no margarine! Mary Berry says margarine. Can I use butter instead?
No. If the recipe says margarine then margarine it must be.
His face falls. I relent.
Of course, you could use butter. That book is ancient. I'll bet Mary Berry never uses margarine now. Nobody does.
He relaxes.
The recipe also called for demerara sugar and there isn't enough. He uses soft brown to make it up. Mixed fruit. He takes sultanas, seedless raisins and chopped cherries and mixes them together. In very short order the rock cakes are in the oven. He's covered in flour and he doesn't wash up.
Never mind. I pour two glasses of wine and we go to watch Unforgotten.
Luckily the rock cakes were Unforgotten. Out of the oven in time and they weren't the least bit stodgy or boring. They were yum.
