Wednesday, October 17, 2007

I Blame The Government

Bert was appalled when he heard what I spend on going to Weightwatchers just to get weighed.

£5.50 per week just to stand on a weighbridge! Give me £5.50 a week and I’ll buy scales and weigh you!

But it’s not the same. Knowing I’m going in there motivates me.

And do you know that if you miss a week they make you pay extra. And if you miss a whole bunch of weeks you have to pay the joining fee all over again. That’s about £14.

It takes ages too. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people go to those classes. And some of them even stay for the lecture/talk/whatever. Instead I go to Lidls and stock up on fruit and cottage cheese.

While I’m standing in the queue waiting to pay and waiting to be weighed I watch my fellow Weightwatchers. There is one young woman who has been there since I started. She’s really big and, so far, I haven’t noticed her reducing in size. But she probably has. Three months isn’t very long when your target weight is probably half your starting weight.

There are other people who attend regularly and who aren’t even slightly fat. One woman, who I know slightly, is actually quite thin but for some reason she thinks she needs to be thinner.

There is another woman, not particularly big, who has got big bald patches behind her ears from trailing her hair back into one of those severe facelift pony-tails. Like me she gets weighed and goes to Lidls where I examine her trolley and notice that it’s full of fizzy drinks and crisps. They’re probably not for her. After all the chocolate biscuits in mine are not for me. They are for Bert. I don’t smile at her as she is too scary looking. I think she might have been the sort of girl who used to get into cat-fights at the Flamingo.

Some of the women in the Weightwatchers queue discuss what Weightwatcher biscuits they’ll be buying. I think they’re mental. You wouldn’t catch me eating their overpriced junk. Back in July I ate some of their low fat yogurt and felt quite ill.

This week for the first time ever I actually put on a pound. I was not disheartened. I blamed society and my heavy winter trousers.


Mudflapgypsy said...

"Catfights in the Flamingo"- this had me cackling with laughter.

Whatever sparks your motivation can only work, no? If it is going to the meeting every week then so what?
As long as it works.

The abrogation of the individuals responsibility is a pile of crap.

Have the govt decided we are all babies who need looking after...oh, wait....

Makes me mad. If I go and eat all the pies I only have myself to blame.

There is a place for the argument about the populace being kept dumb and saturated with advertising propaganda on behalf of the processed food companies too.

Responsibility starts with the individual, I say.

Nelly said...

'...advertising propaganda on behalf of the processed food companies'

Which, ironically, includes organisations like Weightwatchers.

It's a crazy world we've made for ourselves.

Now don't get me started on the government's recommendations on alcohol consumption.

Hails said...

I gave up on Weightwatchers because of the money issue. (Also because it was starting to get really embarrassing). Now, Zed has recently joined Slimming World, which apparently must NOT be called a "diet". I had been mocking her all week because it seems to work like this:

There are Green days and there are Red days.
On Green days, you can eat pasta and rice and stuff.
On Red days you can eat meat.
And you can eat AS MUCH AS YOU WANT of the relevant foods, with limited amounts of the food from the other colour group.

Obviously, this is totally absurd. The girl has been eating like Homer Simpson for a week. She ate about a kilo of pasta in two days. She cannot possibly be losing weight.

And yet she got weighed last night and has lost 4 pounds. I am bewildered, and a little annoyed.

I also seem to have hijacked your blog. Sorry. This should have been a post, not a comment. I'm a bit confused.

Nelly said...

I like my blog being hijacked so don't be sorry. For instance Mudflapgypsy wrote all the stuff I was thinking which saved me the trouble. Thanks MFG. If this was an audition you'd get the part.

And you Hails have saved me the trouble of researching Slimming World. It sounds very interesting. Only thing is you haven't told me what it costs.

Zed said...


And I object to the Homer Simpson comment.

Nelly said...

*rubs belly, growls*

mmmm pies

Lord Garfunkel of CobbleFord said...

Jolly nice post Nelly.

I can't be doing with this whole losing weight malarkey, its bad for the soul. And food is so moreish.

Best Regards
Eat your way to fitness.

ganching said...

...but not as moreish as crack cocaine.

Mudflapgypsy said...


I can just imagine sitting round a table in a posh tea shoppe with a cakestand full of fairy cakes and saying" ooh, I'm just not in the mood for any of those buns but pass that pipe my way that crack is really moreish". hehehehehehehehehe.

sexy said...