...which is why I'm in Spide City this weekend. It was supposed to be my weekend off, my only weekend off in a six-week rota, it was supposed to be the easy week where I claimed all my time-owed-in-lieu and relaxed in my newly guest-free house with Bert and the Banana.
And it could have been a seven day week if I hadn't refused shifts on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.
They're restless too in Spide City. I'm expecting mayhem tonight. Hope I'm wrong. I'm too tired for mayhem.
My dream shift - I go in. The person I relieve has done all the work so I can take it easy. The atmosphere is relaxed and peaceful. All around ladies sit chatting pleasantly, sipping tea, doing needlepoint and making scrapbooks. There is a delicious smell of home baking coming from the kitchen. All the ladies have an early night.
My nightmare shift - I go in. The person I relieve has done nothing, (because she too has had a nightmare shift) so I have to work like a dog. The atmosphere is tense. All around ladies sit glaring at each other and screaming abuse, throwing tea around and threatening to kick each other's heads in. There is a miasma of cheap fag smoke and the reek of rancid trainers coming from the kitchen. All the ladies go out drinking and on their eventual return keep me up all night fighting and smashing delpht* The police bring me two referrals at 2am.
That's them fighting and smashing plates. Not me
6 comments:
I hope the ladies behave themselves for my mummy.
Thank you for the CD - it arrived this morning. Looking forward to listening to it.
Love Kathins
I found another one that I forgot to give you. Christmas! Post it to you soon or by February. Love. Mommy. Dearest.
"I'm Just A Girl Who Can't Say No..." & and "The person I relieve" .....it must be the country air up there ...I'm sure it's exhausting :-)
How awfully rude of you. A dog (your dog?) would have more manners. ;)
So sorry Nelly that you had to work my weekend shift but the bloody takeaway gave me food poisoning (it couldn't have been my turkey as I am an excellent cook!)and once I'd stopped projectile vomiting, I started keeling over in Jane Austen-esque faints. Tell Bert I'm sorry too for spoiling your dirty weekend! I'm off to doctor now to have me low blood pressure checked and should be back on duty in Spide City by 3pm regardless of result as stress there will soon raise blood pressure!
Bah! Humbug! I should set the dogs on you Ursa Minor! Especially my bitch, the rottweiler Tasha. She'd have you except she's got a poor sore paw at the mo. I think she hurt it fighting.
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