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Mince, onion and carrots was on the menu for tonight's supper. There was just one problem - no carrots. Bert says,
Never worry. Sure I dug a bucket of carrots the other day. They're in one of the sheds.
Goodoh. You going to fetch them?
Mmm. Yeah. Except I can't remember which shed they're in.
I don't know what it is he gets up to that gives him such a poor recall of recent events. Anyway out he goes armed with big torch to return minutes later in a rage.
Some bastard's away with our carrots!
You're joking! Maybe you were in the wrong shed?
No! I found the bucket I put them in. They're away - every last one of them!
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This was strange. Who'd nick a bucket of carrots and not even take the bucket? It's only a week or two since we were robbed of a stone of beetroot out of the tractor shed. Once again the thief (or thieves) took the veggies but left the containers.
It wasn't a pleasant thought that some vegetable thief was sneaking about our yard robbing our roots but it was very strange that they were leaving the containers behind. If I was out pinching beetroot I'd definitely take the buckets and trays they were in.
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So we thought again. Maybe it was Ratty that made off with the beetroot and carrots? But Ratty tends to gnaw food where he finds it. He makes a mess. Our veggie thief didn't leave as much as a leaf behind.
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So this left Mr Nutkin. I truly believe that somewhere around this place there's a big-tailed grey fecker sitting on a mound of beetroot and carrots that would choke a donkey. And to think it was only yesterday I was giving out to Bert about trying to blast Tufty out of the trees. I'll be positively encouraging him from now on.
BLAMMM! Take that ye beetroot-munching bastard!
1 comment:
Where's that motion-sensitive, night-vision camera when you need it?
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