Wednesday, February 05, 2020

Pondering Time

No blogging yesterday even though it was the Youngest (Leitrim) Sister's birthday. She knows I was thinking about her.

Leitrim Sister isn't the only one to be occupying my thoughts for I've also been thinking about my Katkin and my Antrim family. And about the olden days - when Martha was a baby.

For I've been sorting out bits and pieces, trying to declutter and in the process, I've been checking out DVDs from a decade ago, when Martha was a baby. Her entire existence seems such a short time to me. She was brand new then and her life was uncomplicated and magical, her parents entranced with her. Watching it made my heart ache for I thought too of Ava, who didn't even get to be ten.

It must be an old girl thing this looking back. When I was younger I'd go through old photographs and enjoy them but then, that was more than just a remembrance of things past. There was all the time to come as well.

There is some sweetness in the thought of one's future running out. How many more seasons for snowdrops, celandine, dog violets? How many more sunsets, how many more dogs?

And yet we plod on Bert and I. Living these last few decades, wasting our time. Maybe that is what time is for. Squandering. Maybe not.

Martha's first birthday

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