Three Sleeps

There was more gridlock today, but despite that, it was a good day.

We went to a Christmas Party, Martha, Evie, myself and Bert. Was at the Oldpark Road, with the girl's friends - Caitlin, Cara and Maria and our oldest friends Robin & Lorraine, also known as the Wees. The food was good and the craic was mighty, I'd forgotten how much fun hide and seek was, not that the grands played it, we just lied a lot as to where certain small people may or may not be hiding.

On the way back I headed for Cullybackey instead of Galgorm and there was Gridlock. I allowed a huge tractor and trailer in front of me just for the fun of it. As Bert said, it might cut a swathe for us. No such luck. The tractor and trailer pulled out, all optimism and the Peugeot van (us) behind it, all filled with Christmas spirit and then - everything stopped. Then - a steady stream of small cars driven by small people mounting the pavement and edging slowly past the tractor. All it would have taken would have been just one considerate, mannerly and decent soul to wait until the tractor, the Peugeot van, and a few other vehicles to pass and we'd all have moved towards our final destinations. What is it about Cullybackey drivers that brings churlishness to the fore? As always, there was the usual ignorantly parked drivers outside Boots the Chemist. This would be Boots that actually has an underused car park at the back of its premises. See sick people? See so called sick people with big free prescription needs? These are people that believe themselves to be so entitled. Let someone else pay for my paracetamol only 25 pence per packet at most leading stores. I'll park wherever I like. I'm an invalid. Who cares if delivery trucks and other humans are inconvenienced? Not I.

Enz-way - rant over. I'm glad I don't work in a chemist shop. I think I might get to suffer those killing people fantasies I had when I worked at that Dunclug hostel.

Which reminds me, last night's waking dream was Prince Harry dying from a wasting disease in a squalorous building and tended in his last hours by my brothers, Eamon and Joseph. What the hell's that all about?

Christmas preparation - presents wrapped and given. Party attended and human beings treated in a loving and Christmas-spirited manner.

Gridlock

Four more sleeps...

Busy day today. Took Hannah to town and shopped in Lidl where the Christmas vegetables were so cheap they were practically free. Got into a conversation with a pleasant lady who informed me that she expected her vegetables to stay fresh until New Year's Day as she planned to keep them in a cold shed. Also bought three more bottles of wine. Will keep them in a cool scullery.

Got home and removed vegetables from packaging and took them to a cold shed where I found Bert fashioning a table from a vintage Singer sewing machine base and a slab of cold marble. I expect this will be my Christmas present.

Cleaned the house to a low standard. Went back into town to pick up Hannah. It was Bert's turn but he was fashioning a table etc. and he also needed to bring the pigs in from the cold field.

Cullybackey. What can I say? It's never easy to get through it at the best of times but five o'clock, a few days before Christmas is far from the best of times. There was a big yellow dump truck in front of us and I was explaining to Hannah that it was a good plan when following a large and bulky vehicle to assume that if it could get through then the medium size van following it should get through too. It has always worked for me. Until today that is. We got as far as the Mace shop when the dump truck stopped. And did not move. After four minutes or so the nose of a white jeep appeared, the driver trying to get between the truck and the Maine Bakery with only a slim chance of making it. Inch by inch the truck moved forward, the jeep was nearly through the window of the bakery and I managed to wiggle into a space in front of the supermarket taking Hannah and I out of the jam. The dump truck got through and the jeep got through, the woman driving it staring straight ahead as she knew she looked like an eejit and there behind the jeep was a huge forty foot lorry. And the reason the traffic had come to a standstill - some dickhead parked outside the chemist, nose to the kerb, arse sticking out a foot and a half from it. There are these stickers you can get that say Parked Like A C**t. I don't believe I've ever seen a more deserving recipient.

Christmas preparations? Made mince pies, bought and wrapped presents. Got the Christmas tree as far as the door and forgot, until just now, to give any thought to the wreath.

Feeling pretty relaxed. Received as gifts bottles of champagne and gin. This is looking like a good Christmas.

We were visited this evening by three men and a dog. Everyone thought the puppy was pretty cute, except, of course, our own dogs who either ignored her, were afraid of her or, tried to bite her.

Bad Girl Jess!