Who needs curtains when you can dress your windows with sweet lil ol' ladies.
If anybody is interested I have several to spare. They are easy to feed. All they need is a wee sup of tay and a bit of soda bread and jam 4-5 times a day.
Some help with corsets may be required on occasion.
5 comments:
Yeah, who need curtains? Especially with all those dogs and their paedophiles lurking about
Ah ha! You have fallen into my evil plot... I have patented the words "Curtains shmurtans", and thusly I am owed a royalty of one bajillion dollars everytime someone uses them without prior permission! You owe me one bajillion dollars!
Bugger. You spelled shmurtans differently. That means I don't get my money. Oh well. Cancel the retirement plans, Ed.
Adam - it is a very long time since paedophiles took an interest in either Bert or myself. As for their dogs - well they cannot choose their owners, can they?
Ed - I'll be very careful about quoting you in future. And have you any idea how disinherited and dead I might be if certain parties were internet savvy?
Paedophiles - I'm so glad Adam brought that up because it gives me the opportunity to point out that Gary Glitter, in his recent photographs, appears to be modelling himself on Twenty Major. Or maybe he was trying for Ho Chi Minh? Anyway it has failed. He's just not scrawny enough - neither him or his goatee. A longer sentence might have helped improve his rating on the scrawnometer.
It was the opinion in the office that he was going for the Ho Chi Minh, to try and get on the good side of the judicial system.
And seeing as how his charges were downgraded, meaning that the firing squad wasn't one of the options, it looks like it worked.
Which is a pity. Ten years hard labour would have served him well.
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