Monday, August 15, 2005

Springer's Mingers

I don't usually watch programmes like Jerry Springer or Trisha. I hear enough tales of woe in real life to be bothered with them and I don't really get where the entertainment is supposed to be.

But passing through the TV room at work this morning my eye was drawn to the screen. There in the studio sat two women and one man and I think both the women were his exes and they were berating the poor fellow for laziness and poor hygiene. Oh Robin! You should have seen them. The three of them hadn't enough teeth between them to make one decent mouthful. He had the sweetest smile and not one toothy peg on the top row. I don't know about the bottom. He was also missing an arm poor lad. As he was being publicly humiliated I thought that even stinking, sans teeth and sans left arm he could still do better for himself than those two.

Blade one (the fat one) had roots six inches long and a mouthful of decaying stumps and Blade two (the hag) was ditto the decaying stumps and was sporting a ring in her right nostril that looked like it was purchased at the vet's for Ferdinand. Urrgh. If I was Jerry Springer I'd be wanting a shower straight after the show.

6 comments:

Lost Identity said...

Everyone tells me that the guest get paid to go on and tell their stories. Maybe I should make up a story to go on the show--I could use a bit of cash!

Ronni said...

Did you know that Jerry Springer has a law degree, and was considering running for public office?

It's our way of parading our trash to the world. TV at its absolute worst!

Nelly said...

NO No No! LD you must never do that.

Ronni - yess I did know about Jerry Springer's political ambitions. But he found himself a far more lucrative career than I reckon he'd have made in government.

And how many politicians get to have a stage show starring David Soul? ;)

Neddy W. said...

A Bad Thing That Has Happened To Me:
A nasty old bug (not contagious, but how the hell did I get it?) has visted me of late and I have felt like shite for weeks and I have only had enough energy to gaze at this PC.
A Good Thing That Has Happened To Me:
Whilst gazing at the PC I leant on Nelly's Garden gate and fell in. Nelly made me laugh. Nelly made me cry. Nelly made me think. Thank you Nelly.
You are a pleasure to read, you write well.

Neddy w.
PS: I even read your back catalogue.
PPS: I posted this message on your photo-site, I don't know why.

Ronni said...

Your pics are magnificent! I have one of these blogs that I just started, http://ronnisrants.blogspot.com. I'd be honoured if you would visit. There's a link there to my former Tripod effort.

Nelly said...

Flippin' heck peeps. Don't you know one of my most endearing qualities is my humility. Go easy on the compliments. But thanks anyway.