I don't usually watch programmes like Jerry Springer or Trisha. I hear enough tales of woe in real life to be bothered with them and I don't really get where the entertainment is supposed to be.
But passing through the TV room at work this morning my eye was drawn to the screen. There in the studio sat two women and one man and I think both the women were his exes and they were berating the poor fellow for laziness and poor hygiene. Oh Robin! You should have seen them. The three of them hadn't enough teeth between them to make one decent mouthful. He had the sweetest smile and not one toothy peg on the top row. I don't know about the bottom. He was also missing an arm poor lad. As he was being publicly humiliated I thought that even stinking, sans teeth and sans left arm he could still do better for himself than those two.
Blade one (the fat one) had roots six inches long and a mouthful of decaying stumps and Blade two (the hag) was ditto the decaying stumps and was sporting a ring in her right nostril that looked like it was purchased at the vet's for Ferdinand. Urrgh. If I was Jerry Springer I'd be wanting a shower straight after the show.