One on my personal style:
Nelly: "You don't think this outfit is too boring and sensible do you?"
Bert: "Naw. You could never look boring. Not with that mad looking face."
On my efforts to lose weight:
"You know I think you are losing weight. Either your waist has got smaller or your arse and tits have got bigger."
This is my current favourite which was uttered earlier tonight.
"You are losing weight. But you're still a wee puddin'"