Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Mouldy Wheaten and Rotten Pears

"Presently, Ormo sell the widest range of bread and morning goods in Northern Ireland where it is famous for traditional Irish breads and unique recipes for soda and potato farls, barmbrack and wheaten bread."
Yesterday evening I went to the local supermarket and bought a packet of sliced wheaten bread. Feckless as always I failed to check the sell-by date. This morning Bert remarked,

When did you buy that bread?


Well it’s foosted and its sell-by date was the day before yesterday.

Right! I’m taking that back.

So you should.

He then goes to help himself to another slice.

Put that down. I can hardly take it back saying it was mouldy and you with the half of it in ye!

So I returned and I was rather firm with them. Said that I wasn’t happy. Stressed the disappointment we’d felt on sampling our morning goods and finding them stale. Pointed out that a day past the sell-by date was unacceptable.

Yay! £1.09 returned to my pocket and a free loaf.

The last time I complained about a bag of rotten pears I was nice about it and only got my money back. No complimentary pears.

Then we made up this song.

And here's to you Mr Henderson
Stick your mouldy wheaten up your hole….

I hadn’t the nerve to sing it to them in the shop. I think I’d have blown my chance of getting complimentary morning goods.

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