Thursday, June 02, 2005

Licence To Spill

It is fashionable nowadays for women's trousers to hang low and for tops to ride high. This means that an awful lot of belly flesh is on display. Sometimes this is a Good Thing, sometimes it is not. For every outed toned and tanned belly on display there are ten floppy, flabby and pasty ones. Some of the young women in my place of work sport stomachs that have a life of their own. Some of them could be beating those bellies down the road with the aid of a stick pulled from a hedge. Ballymena Borough Council is missing a trick. They currently charge £5 for a dog licence fee, which is in my opinion, reasonable and affordable. Even the unemployed or students could afford a fiver for a belly baring licence - the revenue raised could be used for...... suggestions anyone?

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Right, £5 per overexposed gut...

by, say, 150,000 such guts province-wide... (conservative figure)

So, three quarters of a million. Which would be more than enough to purchase everyone else in the country with special glasses to hide the aforementioned guts from view.

Ed

Nelly said...

Good suggestion. I note that the sexism and body fascism of my post left you quite unbothered.

Anonymous said...

Well, in the interests of equality of sexism, I'm expecting some kind of action to be carried out re. blokes in three quarter length trousers and basketball sweat gear.

And body fascism is clearly the way forward.

Ed

Nelly said...

But of course it would be OK to wear this sort of gear unlicenced in the privacy of one's own home or garden? Which is a get-out clause for Marc.

Stray Toaster said...

Though, to be fair, I did wear my shorts to work today (and yesterday). Not the same pair, mind, due to the one time it ever rained here was yesterday, while I was cycling home. Though why people asked me where my skateboard was is beyond me. I love my Converse AllStars.

Nelly said...

And I love your Converse AllStars too. What colour are they?

Stray Toaster said...

Black, of course. (My Eddie Current where-are-my-freaking-red-hightops days are gone.)

http://www.stray-toaster.co.uk/jpgs/080505c.jpg

As a bonus, I am in my 3/4 shorts there too.

Nelly said...

You're shameless you are.

Stray Toaster said...

I suuuuure am. :)

Lost Identity said...

Speaking of licenses...
The fine town that I live in just passed a law that citizens must purchase a permit to drink alcohol in public parks. Maybe they could sell belly bearing permits at the same office.