How would you like a job where you had to advise people on their personal hygiene?
Problem: The Room
Approach A: Perhaps you ought to freshen your room up, open a window, tidy up a little.
Approach B: This room is stinking! Get it cleaned! Now!
Problem: The Person
Approach A: What a pity you missed work because you were out drinking last night. You've been in bed ever such a long time. I'm sure you'd feel a lot better if you had a nice wee shower.
Approach B: Phew! When did you last have a shower? When?!!! Don't you dare storm off while I'm talking to you!
Approach A: Give her some time off to refill her deep wells of empathy and compassion.
Approach B: Pension her off. She's burnt out.