This afternoon I informed Beauteous Colleague that I intend to change her Nelly's Garden pseudonym as her current moniker is making her far too full of herself now that she has a new boyfriend* who is constantly telling her how gorgeous she is.
But what shall I call her?
She aspires to chav fashion so she could be a Colleen or a Waynetta.
Gertie has a ring to it but I think she'd object.
Her childhood nickname is rather good - just two letters of her real name transposed and it's deliciously scatological.
I have consulted blogthings name generators. I will ask her which one she likes best. Then I'll choose the one that I like best.
Her Drag Queen name is: Ursula Uranus
Her Hippie Chick name is: Autumn
Her Irish name is: Grainne O'Byrne
Her Japanese name is: Sukey Kimura
Her Porn Star name is: Albino Kitty
Her Stripper name is: Mystique
I like the first one.
*The handsome young PSNI officer from 'Spots' January 2005
The other weekend this handsome young PSNI officer called to the office.... I think he had been hoping to run into my younger colleague, who is in possession of a tumble of hair as dark as a raven’s wing and with sultry good looks to match. But sadly he had to make do with Nelly who presents a much homelier face.
2 comments:
I don't like any of them! But you have my permission (like you care!) to use the pseudonym I created at 15 for the purpose of publishing the series of successful novels I planned to write. It's "Bronte St John" but I want them wee dots over the "e" mind (only I don't know how to do them but I know you will!) And can I just say I'm really sorry I didn't ask you how the drug free lifestyle was going cos I really meant to but I was too busy bending your ear about all the work I've been doing improving community relations with the PSNI! I'm SUPER sorry and I promise not to be so self-obsessed when I next see you (providing said relations with the PSNI haven't broken down of course!). I'll miss you whilst you're off - have a great time!
Love and kisses (oh god - I'm sorry, I can't help it, I'm smitten and sharing the love)
The Artist Formerly Known as Beauteous Colleague
Sorry Urs. I cannot use Bronte St. John (sorry about the missing dots but Zoe's had to learn to live with it) as it is so pretentious that even Ganching wouldn't have used it when she was 15.
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